Kindness: the antidote to a cold heart

So, how do we keep our hearts from turning cold or lukewarm until the spring comes? In other words, how do we keep our hearts on fire with our love for God and neighbor? While there are many possible ways to accomplish that, let me suggest one yet profound way: namely, the practice of kindness.

Recently in our Blanchette Catholic Center, one of our employees was asked what she wanted for her birthday. She replied with one word, “Kindness.” Why did she ask for the gift of kindness? I think it is because she has been inundated with what so many of us have been experiencing, specifically a growing amount of rudeness, anger and unforgiving spirit in an increasingly polarized world. Anyone who works specifically in customer service, or just with “people” in general, reports a rise in angry outburst both verbally and physically.  

While we all want others to be more kind to us, we all also need to work on how to be more kind to others. To do this, a few years ago, someone introduced me to the “FIVE” rule. If you are ever provoked to respond to someone in an unkind way, ask yourself, “Before any nasty words leave my mouth, how will I feel about what I am about to say in the next five seconds? In five minutes? In five hours? In five days? And in five years? It is possible that we might feel better in the next five seconds, five minutes or even five hours. However, it is always good to take a wider perspective and ask, “Is what I am about to say something I will be proud of or regret in the next five days or five years?”

In the Gospels, Jesus gives us an example of what it looks like to be grounded in kindness. In the times that he is dismissed, criticized, opposed, jeered, mocked, and even and tortured physically, he responds with a cumulative and resounding, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.” As we lean into Jesus, our daily prayer lives help to connect to the Sacred Heart of Jesus as we appeal to his love and mercy.

We may be tempted to reject this movement toward kindness because it may be interpreted as a sign of weakness. We might think, “Fine, I am willing to be kinder to others. But that will not help change the rude and angry behaviors of so many other people out there!” However, never forget that kindness is wonderfully infectious. As St. Augustine wrote, “One loving heart sets another on fire.” In other words, when we speak and act with kindness, it can spread and multiply in others.

At the Diocese of Joliet, we model and multiply the kindness that Jesus displayed in his life and his works in our ministries. Our Catholic schools teach kindness when students are instructed in Catholic social teaching as part of the regular curriculum. Our Catholic Charities teaches kindness when providing a room for the homeless at Daybreak Shelter or delivering food to the needy through its mobile food pantry. Our adult formation program teaches kindness when accompanying individuals through a study of the Gospels. And our vocations program teaches kindness when helping young men and women discover the fullness of a life devoted to the Lord.

The need for kindness is why the theme for our 2022 Catholic Ministries Annual Appeal (CMAA) is “Devoted to the Works of the Lord.” It is through the kindness found woven throughout our works dedicated to God that we find peace and salvation. I encourage you to learn more about our ministries and how you can multiply the kindness of our works through the CMAA by going to this website: www.jolietdioceseappeal.org    

I hope you agree that none of us wants to have cold or lukewarm hearts. We long for hearts on fire with love of God and neighbor. As we wait for the spring, might we consider to be the change we want to see in the world by practicing kindness frequently. As St. Teresa of Kolkata said, “Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God’s kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile.”